First time here? Start at the beginning.
The next night I got a call from Audrey. She was an undergrad I’d picked up in the fall and made out with in her hallway. She’d told me she didn’t know what she wanted. I’d told her to call me when she figured it out. She hadn’t, but she wanted to before heading back to the South for summer break.
We planned to meet the next night at a bar in the East Village. I felt blasé because Audrey was two months younger than I. I hadn’t hung out with anyone younger in a year so I just assumed she’d be the opposite of the perfect lawyer-straightforward, attainable, weak. Plus, I’d been so drunk that night we’d hooked up. For all I knew she was unattractive.
I got to the area early and watched people from the bench-like rim of an elevated square with a tree growing out of it. All the buildings next to me were, at their base, bars. On my other side people walked in and out of the crooked rivulet of cabs. Everything was all lit up but there was still a drop of natural light on the sidewalk too. After a few minutes I spotted the perfect lawyer carrying her suit jacket in one hand and a stapled paper bag of dinner in the other. What a coincidence that she would be walking between the subway station and her apartment at 8:20. Her lips moved as she shouldered past the more lackadaisical pedestrians: “excuse me.” I felt a jolt of pride as her face brightened.
“Hey there, almost-2L!” We talked about exams for a little while before the perfect lawyer asked what I was up to.
“I’m meeting this girl… whatever…”
“Ooh-ooh! Can I wait with you so I can see her?”
I shrugged and hoped that Audrey would be attractive.
She was. She had long blonde hair with highlights and wore the red and white checked dress that was in the window display at Ralph Lauren Rugby. Unfortunately she was short though, and she wore at least three types of eye makeup. She waved and smiled a little as she approached.
“Hi,” the perfect lawyer said. “I’m the perfect lawyer. I was just passing by.”
I introduced her, everyone smiled, and then the perfect lawyer excused herself.
“Give me a call later,” she said. “But I understand if you don’t.”
As I opened the door for Audrey she said, “do you dance? Like ballet?”
I didn’t smirk. I hadn’t smirked since the first time a girl asked me if I were a dancer. The absurdly good luck of that come-on didn’t need to be noted anymore. Other people wrote the script, I just said my line:
“I have some classical training. Nine years. But I was expelled.”
God I’m so interesting! (They would say.) Yes I’m quite a character.
*
Audrey had impeccable taste in movies, TV shows, and writers. One obscure pick and one guilty pleasure in each category. I couldn’t think of any movies, TV shows, or writers that I liked. For the sake of conversation I provided some explanations for why I didn’t like movies, TV, or books, and that made Audrey laugh.
“What are you doing tonight,” she asked as I poured down the last pale drops of the second vodka cranberry.
“I don’t know,” I said. Her eyes were on mine. I could hook up with her. But not at my apartment. Then what if she refused to leave. Her place was thirty blocks uptown though, and the forecast said it might rain later. I decided to buy time while I came up with a subtle way to suggest we hook up in the bathroom. “What are you doing tonight?”
“Hopefully something involving… you.”
You! The word startled me. It was how she said it. As if she had an idea of me called you. The girl had been bending over all night collecting my stupid jokes and placing them in a box labelled You. Now she was trying to give me the box. I didn’t want it back!
“Oh, yeah… But you know I’m actually still in the middle of finals. I need to work on my outline tonight.” I pushed my mouth to one side in an expression of regret.
She picked my right hand off the table with both of hers. Red polished nails, and somewhat long. This girl knew even less about being a lesbian than I did. I pulled my hand out, angry that she was trying to manipulate me.
